Sunday, December 19, 2010

I made things:

The third one is a footless stocking.
A holiday legwarmer if you will.
Please do not mistake it for a regretsy. 

I'm kicking myself for not sending out this photo (taken of us at the post-apocalyptic book-burning party) as our holiday family photo:

(photo stolen from Amanda Mayhugh)

Saturday, November 13, 2010

A big day.

This week Rachel and I had a distance date. We watched the same move at the same time, ate and drank and prayed and wrote each other letters. Socialization for hermits/long-distance friends with no gas money. The movie we watched was "Good Dick." It's was oddly romantic.

Today was big: I started an art journal, Marvin started GED classes, and we became an aunt and uncle.

Meet Remy - five pounds and an ounce of preciousness. He decided to make his debut a bit early, but is doing really is his mama.

Other things that have happened recently:

Wednesday, Gomez, and Pugsley Addams.
Laughed harder than I had in awhile...about a talking turkey puppet.

Bought a printer and became absolutely obsessed with coupon-clipping and free samples. So far I've gotten $96 worth of Burt's Bees products for $44, $35 worth of food at La Hacienda for $10, free potato oles, free birdseed, and free Tom's toothpaste...just to name a few. It's getting a little ridiculous.  All of this started after I watched a YouTube video of a woman who bought over $200 worth of groceries for ONE PENNY.

Mostly I've just been peddling a LOT of granola. One of my co-workers has a yoga-related foot injury so I've been working longer shifts and extra days to cover for her.

Do you ever get creeped out by things that shouldn't be creepy? Recently I had a bunch of bees seemingly appear out of thin air in the kitchen and then woke up in the middle of that night to the whole house smelling (mysteriously and intensely) of garlic. Strange.

Happy November. <3

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Amelie likes and bulleted lists

I like it when I finally decide to be unhealthy for awhile and eat a whole bag of candy.

I like it when cats snore

and trees rain leaves on me

and when I sit outside on my lunch break and witness the weenie dog from down the street walk half a block just to pee on a tree in a yard that belongs to a gigantic dog that is stuck inside a pen.

And I like my husband's hairy butt. Said it.

Speaking of that hairy has gone to see Danzig and left me alone at night for the first time in probably YEARS. In my alone-ness I plan to:
  • dye my hair
  • eat more candy
  • maybe jump on the bed
  • maybe eat some other stuff besides candy
  • make bulleted lists
  • peel the paper off of crayons
  • take advantage of having the fancy t.v. to myself and watch foreign films until I either feel pretentious or fall asleep
Exciting things that have happened since I last blogged:
  • got a toe or two back in my dancing shoes thanks to Brother Andy
  • also got one of Bob's mustache hairs in my mouth. I'm not telling how.
  • dug up some crystals on 101010
  • survived a corn maze
  • fessed up to some brokenness
  • dreamt of visiting the new Red Velvet location. (Best. Dream. EVER.)
  • befriended a racoon

Maybe I shouldn't have fed him so much cheese - one of his homies climbed in the window and hung out in our bedroom last weekend when I was out of town. Feral cats, bats, raccoons...we certainly have lots of wild animals that decide to kick it in our apartment. I'm okay with it as long as they don't eat my candy, give me rabies, or poop on stuff.

Thursday, September 30, 2010


Oh, hello.
Saturday at the Food & Faith Fair, I got to see a worm bin, some heirloom seeds, and lots of people in the community learning about sustainability. It was neat and just my cup of tea. That evening I drove up into the mountains to be with my mama on her birthday. She turned sixty-seven on Sunday. We ate chocolate cake and played Monopoly to celebrate! The roadkill count on the way there was pretty high:

Opossum: 4
?: 3
Raccoon: 2
Cat: 2
Skunk: 2
'dillo: 1
Bird: 1
Shih Tzu: 1

 But I did manage to rescue a tortoise from a similar fate.

My mama gave me some of the pot-holders she'd sewn. I've been doing a lot of cooking to break them in properly. She and daddy also loaded me up with sweet potatoes, banana peppers, pears, and persimmons. Yum.

Once I came back home, there's been one date, two bike rides, a little Netflix, and a lot of enjoying the nice weather. I also have this dream of covering one of my walls with pictures of planets and stars and moons. It's a work in progress that may or may not turn into a disaster.

Oh, and I started a tumblr. Marvin called me a hipster. He was listening to Animal Collective when he called me a hipster. I pointed this out and he shut up. This is the link. I'm bad about posting pictures that belong to other people and not giving them credit for their work...due to not remembering where the picture came I thought a tumblr might be convenient for sharing pretty things.

Wednesday, September 22, 2010


Merry Autumnal Equinox!

Bring on the cider and crunchy leaves. The cardigans. The cool starry hammock nights. The hot baths. The ginger tea and pumpkin flavored things.

Speaking of pumpkin flavored things...I can't stop eating pumpkin spice hershey kisses. They are heaven in my mouth. We finally found them while on a trip to bring Bob his kitten. The long car ride went surprisingly well, with the kitten sleeping most of the time and staring out the window and trying to lick the foam off of my latte the rest. I think Bob and the kitten will be the best of friends and I think he might name her Lily. They make a cute couple, that Bob and Lily!

I had a customer who was making her granddaughter some monster spray out of lavender and water and glitter. I am certain that it will work. Magic like that usually does.

Please pray for Brandi & Remy, Chip & family, Jonny & family, and Pam...if you feel inclined...and can remember all those names. :)

Thursday, September 16, 2010


A million and one little things to learn about in one tiny day off.
Car engines & activated charcoal & nature therapy, among other things.

I've learned that a strong cup of coffee in the morning makes me far more tolerant of the gossipy middle aged drama queens I work with. It also makes me zoom around and fidget, which then makes me laugh at myself - bettering my mood as well as making the fussbudgets more bearable. God bless 'em, but they drive me nuts.

In other work news: Earlier this week I was sitting on the floor, stocking some medicinal teas on a lower shelf, when one of our regular customers (who happens to be obsessed with shoes) plops down beside me and very rapidly removes my shoe and sock, touches my foot, and comments on how soft it is and wants to know what kind of lotion or exfoliant I use. As I was putting my shoe back on, I told him I didn't use any products on my feet, abandoned the pile of echinacea elderberry tea, felt slightly violated, and found some work to do in the back until the guy left. This incident made me realize I am completely unprepared to handle uncomfortable non-textbook situations. Outside of the workplace I probably would have kicked the fellow in the face, regardless of how "nice" he was, but I had no idea how to deal with having my foot fondled in a professional setting. (But is anyone ever prepared for such things? Doubt it.) Perhaps I should have kicked him in the face anyway.

And while we're on the topic of uncomfortableness, I'd like to recommend never watching The Runaways with your mother & and father-in-law...unless you're really okay with viewing sex and masturbation scenes in the presence of your spouse's parents.

Call me old-fashioned, but I found it a bit on the awkward side.

Thursday, September 9, 2010

Birfs and crafts.

My first pumpkin spice latte of the season came with a free pumpkin cream cheese muffin. Thank you, overly enthusiastic Starbucks employee, for making my day.

There's another 'bucks I'm hooked on: Swagbucks. It's a site that pays you a tiny bit to search the internet. Slowly but surely I am searching my way to some PayPal dollars with which I will purchase lovely Etsy things that I don't really need:

Yup. Trivial trinkets.

Marvin's parents flew in last weekend. We hiked and watched movies and ate a bunch of doughnuts and grilled a little.

His dad fixed our broken air conditioner, light fixture, and sink...all in twenty minutes. Now I can read books in the living room without going blind and/or sweating half to death. Yay!

We had Bob's kitten spayed last week. Her shaved belly is real tute. Once her stitches are out, she'll be ready to move in with Bob. I will miss her.

Speaking of Bob, check out his King of all Cosmos costume:

Isn't it amazing?
I wish I could take credit for it, but all I did was remove a pocket and cut out some foam flowers. Even that much involvement made me want to craft more!

Happy birthday to, well...pretty much everyone I know!

You are all great and I love you a ton even though I can't remember dates worth a crap. <3

Monday, August 30, 2010

Weekend update.

I saw a baby bear. In the wild. 

(That's all that really matters.)


Sunday, August 22, 2010


The LOST auction begins in three hours.
I've decided to put my money toward this instead:
It's pretty much a faster, roomier version of the car I've had for nine years. It also has more paint and power steering. I got a little teary-eyed while we were out test-driving; I've been with the Metro for longer than I've been with Marvin and it pains me to see her go. But the hatchback Versa will easily carry both of our bikes and I really love the Espresso Black paint job; I just want to eat it. (Poor little Metro. You'll always have my heart.)

Bob's kitten has taken a liking to unrolling all of the toilet paper. She's been banished from the bathroom for the time being.

Also, I take back everything negative I've ever said about "The Office." It kind of rules.

Monday, August 16, 2010

A quote on zines

from Xerography Debt #27:

In the midst of volcanoes, Tea Party rhetoric, earthquakes, layoffs, stock market volatility, and sectarian violence, I am learning to care and not to care - to be free and in the moment. And nothing does that better for me than reading a zine. How is it possible that these 1/4 page miracles of paper and toner can help me escape from grim reality and connect to total strangers that somehow the Internet cannot match? What is it about handwriting and art and loving placement of text that transforms my internal landscape? It is a constant miracle and source of interest and happiness to me. - Maynard Welstand

As you may have guessed, I totally concur.

(Going places.)

Sunday, August 8, 2010


Wrapping up day four of no sugar. I've started taking digestive enzymes with any meal I eat that isn't 100% raw. The experts claim that enzyme supplementation will decrease the amount of energy used up by the body for digestion and use that freed-up energy to assist other cells in need throughout the body...with healing or just more optimal functioning. I tend to always be tired...and I also tend to always be eating, so this could be a monumental step toward feeling not-sucky. I've taken my little enzymes with three meals so far and I do feel pretty awesome. Placebo effect? Possibly. I'll keep you updated.

Marvin and I visited the new self-serve frozen yogurt place today. It might just be my saving grace in this sugarless endeavor. I had the no-sugar-added, fat free pomegranate energy yogurt with strawberries, blueberries, and raspberries. Heavenly! We also checked out the new pet supply place, which has a kitty adoption station, forty pounds of cat litter for $15.00, and a please-bring-in-your-pet policy. Thumbs up there, too. The new dollar jewelry store had an alarming number of zebra-striped purses and earned an "enh" rating, as did TJ Maxx. We didn't make it to the new grocery store or dollar spot, but we got to visit with Bob, which was undoubtedly cooler than hanging out at a Big Star.

Now I'm making some butternut squash "fries," which are actually baked and contemplating an enormous bike ride. Am I healthy?!?

P.S. - I found some notecards along the lines of ^this^ on clearance for a buck. Yippie! I love foodscapes.

(Heck, I'll even settle for meatscapes.)

Friday, August 6, 2010

Nerding out.

Well, it's day two of the LOST auction. There are already bids on Juliet's death costume and Claire's squirrel baby, but Daniel Farady's Island costume and the DHARMA bikes are still bid-less. I'm waiting until the last few days to register as a bidder since it costs a small fortune to even be allowed to participate in the auction. If the squirrel baby is still in the triple digits, I'm going for it! Who needs an emergency savings fund when you can have LOST props! The DHARMA van's starting bid is set at $8,000, but it isn't guaranteed to be "street legal." Bummer.

Since you've been an avid follower of my "26 before 27" 2010 to-do list, Lauren, I'll go ahead and let you know that plan #12 has just been changed to "Try and win a LOST prop!" Don't judge me.

And now a great picture of the guy who plays Sawyer - from his early modeling days.


Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Where did the evening go?

Oh yes, it was lost in the pool with a mermaid, a boy princess, and two of my favorite pseudo-hippies.
The sunset was nice and pink.
My feet are nice and swollen. I am not enjoying my week of being thrown into the world of business management, but I'm making it. To the best of my knowledge I haven't made any major screw-ups.
The strep throat has gone on its merry way, our bank account will be reimbursed for the fraud within 90 days, and the car is still clanking right along. If it breaks down, so be it. Bikes and hitch-hikes are more fun anyway, right?

Everything is going to be okay.

As soon as the true Granola Queens get back to their managerial posts, I will be the most relaxed person you've ever seen. (Or at least back to my normal level of relaxation, which probably hovers somewhere around Kind Of Uptight.)

Marvin has been appeasing me with Ben & Jerry's, and helping out immensely with all of the cat sitting I've gotten myself into. He is my favorite.

Here we are, looking crusty on vacation. I'd spent the day at the beach with his sisters - he'd been out skateboarding with Todd...and then the whole lot of us cruised around on the "sultry" Georgia heat. I'm not sure why I bothered to try and justify our crustiness in the photo, as we look equally crusty on most any other day. Haha.

In closing, life if freakin' sweet.
Some day I will work at the wildlife refuge in Cabuya.
Some other day I will hike the AT.
And maybe even some other day I will be comfortable taking charge.

P.S. - Where you at, Matt Saunders? Your bicycle is under our deck and every time I see it I think, "Where is Matt Saunders and why isn't he over here demanding that we ride bikes?" Anyway, this is for you:

Monday, July 26, 2010

This Land is Your Land...

I really like the verse that was mysteriously left out of Mr. Guthrie's song when we learned it in school:

As I was walkin'  -  I saw a sign there
And that sign said - no trespassin'
But on the other side  .... it didn't say nothin'!
Now that side was made for you and me!

Sunday, July 25, 2010


makes the perfect amount of sense today.

Thursday, July 22, 2010

Inspiration & optimism...

...we sucked them down like Coca-Cola.

This happily cramping in bed day has been devoted to reading the stacks of printed things within reach, dog-earing and underlining the parts of books, zines, and magazines that I deem the most valuable, and then copying those parts into various journals, little black books, and lists. Once I've digested and/or re-written the goods, the book, zine, or magazine gets passed on to someone else. This has been my system for awhile. It's usually a slow process, but a lot of progress has been made on "the stacks" today. I'm taking a break from my "work" while Marvin takes a break from his. This break was spent browsing ffffound. It was a good ffffound day, as you can see from the pictures above. I only stumbled upon one vagina. You never know what you might ffffind in someones collection. Today I learned that people who like pictures of bunnies dressed in aprons and Fight Club also might like crotch-shots. Who knew? There was also this:

Marvin has given me permission to marry Robert Downey Jr. in the event that I am widowed. My only other Marvin-approved options are Jorge Garcia and Matt Millard:


Wednesday, July 21, 2010

What large children we are here.

Get the cuss out of here, worry.
You's a draining, good-for-nothing, fun-sucker.
I hereby declare the untroubled spirits of four-year-old children for us all.


Monday, July 19, 2010

Dorothy Dale Kloss & a Conway hangout.

She just retired at age 86. When asked her secret for all that vitality she replied, "You know, a little vodka never hurts. No, but really, if you love what you do, you can do it as long as you want."

I love what I am doing these days, which is eating big salads, reading big stories, riding a big bicycle, finding not-so-big but pretty swimmin' holes, and working a little on the side. Then there was that hangout where we got drunk and watched "The Crazies" on mute while having a Lady Gaga dance party and playing Cranium simultaneously. (Okay, so it didn't happen exactly like that...but it was still good times.)

Marvin declared an emergency date night for tonight. I've requested a hot tub, sandwiches, and a George Clooney movie.

Wishing you well,
Sarah R.

Thursday, July 15, 2010


I got a call from the bank last night saying that some suspicious activity had popped up on my debit card account. The account had been frozen, but not before some mega-douche had spent $922.50 of my hard-earned dollars on sporting goods, putting my checking account balance in the negatives. Bank procedure is a little annoying, but the police officer who filed my report was AWESOME. He was the first cop I'd ever dealt with that was actually helpful. He also made lots of jokes, including ones about doughnuts, which helped my blood pressure return to a healthy level. And he wrote the report up as a felony, even though technically I don't think theft is a felony unless the total is above $1,000. Maybe there are loopholes...maybe the officer was just being nice. The ladies at the bank said credit card numbers are relatively easy to access these days. Lame. I should know by tomorrow the state from which the purchases were made. The only suspects we could come up with were hotel employees at the places we stayed that required our card being kept on file. The only other places I've used the card lately were with online donations to nonprofits and to pay bills. Lame, lame, lame. No more online donations. And I'm buying a paper shredder. Even though unshredded documents are not the cause of this problem, I've always wanted a paper shredder...and now seems like an appropriate time to get one. Hmpht.

If something else like this happens, I am going to live in a cave. Or maybe be one of those fruititarians that only eat fruit as it falls from the tree. Any withdrawl from normal society would do.

I'd planned on hiking and biking and swimming in creeks today, but since this drama came up it didn't happen. My revised plan? Hammock, bikini, cats for company, iced tea, and Doris. And maybe a late-night bike ride once the hikers return from the mountains. It's the next best thing.

Despite the events of the day, I still feel pretty much like this:

[Photo courtesy of Lisa Danger James, who is great.]

Now for some good news: My friend Tamara had her baby. He is healthy and breathing on his own and digesting breast milk, even though he has to be fed through a tube until he learns proper sucking techniques. Pretty impressive for a three pound lil guy! Also, Courtney's boobies are okay! Hooray for boobies! (Isn't that an album title for some '90s band?)

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

A bulleted list.


  • 50% of the omelets I made tonight were flawless.
  • I can't stop eating salted and peppered avocados. 
  • Marvin is demanding desserts. 
  • I haven't had a dessert in two days. (This is monumental.) 
  • I named Bob's kitten Darlene so I could yell at her very Rosanne-ly. 
  • Bilberries are not the same as blueberries...but they are cousins. 
  • We had planned to go watch a documentary about dirt tonight, but the thought of climbing all those stairs at the library after doing too much stretching yesterday didn't sound like fun and I would be embarrassed to take the elevator to a film about sustainability. 
  • I want to know more about the British League of Pessimists.
  • I got an invitation that was printed on paper that contained native wildflowers of Arkansas. That made my week. 
  • Fantastic Mr. Fox was...fantastic. 
  • I started keeping a dream diary. There are three entries so far: a race war, a baby pooping on the carpet, and my friend making a movie about her horrible mother. 
  • One of the best dreams I ever had involved singing and dancing cartoon popsicles. 
  • I just figured out that popsicle is a combination of  "lollipop" and "icicle."
  • Dumb. 
Bring on the weekend, please.